Miss Independent

Assalamualaikum.

First of all, if you think this entry is about us, yes it is. and if you are reading this entry currently, please leave. you can never empty your heart and mind if you keep watching me, my blog, my tweets etc. so, can you leave now?

i said i'll stay away from you. it's not that i hate you. it's not that i'm holding grudges towards you. it's not that i'm not forgiving you. but i'm giving you a space. since you asked for it, don't you?

those messages ... i didn't reply. i'm giving you space ... you said, "as long as rasa sayang dan rindu tu wujud waktu kita reply msg, tu dikira zina hati." and rasa tu still ada dalam jiwa zani. masih wujud. so how can i reply?

i've never stop praying for us. and i hope you're doing the same thing. i've never stop waiting, u know it yourself, don't you?

it's been a very hard days for me for the time being. i cried myself to sleep. i woke up every morning crying. i'm dreaming about us but it's not a happy dream. trust me, it's too hard ...

everything i do reminds me of you. even waktu zani nak sidai kain, my brain keeps reminding you. sebab dekat tempat luar nie lah, tempat sidai kain nie lah tempat waktu first time i picked up your call on my birthday last year.

now tell me, how can i live these days?

but whatever it is, i'm trying my best. trust me, i'm trying my best not to think too much. the memories, the flashbacks are randomly played on my mind, i didn't ask for it.

so you don't have to worry about me ... go on with your current path. you chose to make this decision.  i can't do anything except believing in Him, and i put trust on you.

and you know what, everytime i'm thinking of giving up, there's something whispers, "kau tunggu jelah dia. yakin dengan dia."

rasanya sebab tu zani masih hold on sampai sekarang ...

i'll be okay soon. inshaAllah. no worry, thanks for making this decision. somehow it shows how much you want us to be together till Jannah if we're meant to be. thanks :')

i have to be patient. Nano, please be patient. please?

once you come back, i'll definitely greet you. i'm waiting.

do come back soon ...

be strong, stay strong.

"If you give up too soon, you'll never know what you'll be missing. Keep going and NEVER quit."

A friend, Nano.